“Just because someone desires you does not mean they value you.” –UNkNOWN

Find Your Ride Or Die: A Letter To All Ladies (by K-Dot)


“Just because someone desires you does not mean they value you.”  – @SlimDarskin

I saw this tweet on my timeline a couple of weeks ago and it caught my eye. I had a few thoughts I wanted to express on it, so I figured what better place than SBM. I know a whole heap of ladies read this site. Knowing this, I hope these words help some.

It’s darn near common knowledge that a lot of men can be extremely ambiguous when it comes to their intentions. A lot of ladies spend a bunch of time in this grey area trying to figure out “what are we?” Trust me, most guys have heard that question since high school. Today, I tell you that you don’t have to question yourself so much in regards to your stance with someone.
Often times a man tells you all he needs to tell you through his actions.

I’ve said a number of times that you have to listen to what a person is not saying. There should be no sort of confusion once you read someone’s actions. Men desire many things from a woman. His behavior towards you will lend itself to exactly what he’s desiring.

Pay close attention to the conversations you have and the things he remembers about you. To the ladies void of going on dates, pay attention to see if he ever proposes that you all go on one. Figure out what sort of treatment you want. It may annoy you to have to do so, but put it out there. If you want to go out sometimes, even if y’all split the bill, let it be known. Every guy doesn’t have the wherewithal to have that base covered.
If he values you, he’ll take your concerns under advisement without question.

Don’t ever get excited about attention. Attention is as simple as turning any man’s head. Time and effort correlates more with value. When a guy values you, you get a full complete feeling of what’s going on. Your texts get answered, your guy keeps you smiling, and he has interests in what makes you happy. In addition, he’ll have even more interest in what keeps you happy.
The truth is many men have formulas in their head that have shown to work.

They may desire women to solely sleep with. Under that motivation, they have their ways of going about it. This has created women who “fall” for that tactic; therefore, it gives his process some credence. These fellas find ways to get what they want through limited effort. Lies and excuses are fed while not enough attention is spent just feeling out the little things.You ladies just have to make sure a guy is into who you are versus what you are.

We all love butts and breasts….who doesn’t?

Just make sure that same dude wants to see you get your promotion, your master’s or whatever else is the case. In all things, let their be a balance. I think at the end of the day that’s the brass tacks of what I’m trying to say. Nothing works in this life without balance. If you’re not feeling a balance with someone you’re dating, then it’s simply something that should be addressed. Of course communication is paramount. If for no other reason, the more you communicate, the higher the likelihood you have to weed out the BS. You want to be valued more than desired. If you succeed, then you’re more than deserving.

These are my words and I make no apologies.

DamnPops (K-Dot)is a writer on the staff at SBM: “I’m not a biter, I’m a writer for myself and others. ” Brooklyn born dude trying to figure out this life just like you. Come on this journey with me. Follow me on Twitter @DamnPOPS

“Damn He Got A Point” (My Column) on Viral Status


Read more at http://www.singleblackmale.org/2013/10/17/find-ride-die-letter-ladies/

#DesireVersusValue #DatingAndLoveAdvice #DatingAndLoveAdviceForWomen #DatingAndLoveAdviceForWomenFromMen #SingleBlackMaleDotOrg

Alright, Alright, Alriiiight!!! and Seven other Kevin Hart Quotes You Can Use on a Daily Basis by Nick Dimengo

He may not be the most intimidating person on the planet. But, then again, Kevin Hart doesn’t need to be seeing how his main job is to make people laugh. Whether that means he’s on-stage and doing his comedy act or in front of the camera spewing some line that was written for him for a TV show or movie, the guy knows how to get people rolling with his jokes and personality. Over the years, Hart has seemed to just continue to get bigger and bigger, becoming a noticeable contributor on various projects or interviews that fans have seen. Regardless of your personal opinion on his delivery or jokes, in general, Kevin Hart has arguably become the best comedian in Hollywood right now. For that reason, I wanted to take some time and honor some of his finer moments that he has given from a number of different appearance he has done. Those times where he has said something that has somehow, someway stuck with people—and there’s no better way of doing so than pointing out some of his most famous sayings. He seems to be in front of a camera all the time, showing up at award shows or landing a cameo on another TV show, so there’s no escaping what comes out of his mouth—with most of it being pretty memorable. So the next time you overhear someone say one of these, just know that it was Hart who brought it to the mainstream—and that it’s completely OK to use whenever you want. These are the Kevin Hart quotes worth using.

8. Alright, Alright, Alright

Sure, this phrase was undoubtedly made most famous from Matthew McConaughey from his role in Dazed & Confused, but Kevin Hart has helped carry on the tradition of using it. Bringing up memories of his dad using drugs when Hart was younger, he jokes about how his dad would just show up to places when Kevin was a kid and always just mutter the words, “alright, alright, alright.” No matter if you’re quoting


McConaughey or Hart, the phrase is pretty funny and straight to the point—even if it has no relevance on what is going on around you.

7. Bum Bump

Describing one of the most horrid things that could happen while walking on the street, Hart talks about how he thinks it would be for a homeless person to swipe your bottom lip with his fingers. So instead of saying you have a zit that has been bothering you for the last couple days, try playing off by using the word, “bum bump” to lighten the mood a little bit, making everyone laugh that you’re breaking out because someone on the street touched you.

6. Pineapples

The word ‘pineapples’ probably isn’t what you think of when getting with your significant other, but Hart proved that it might be something worth using as a safe word. What does that mean, exactly? Well, when, I’ll call it experimenting, in the bedroom, if things get a little too awkward or uncomfortable, use pineapple as a safe word to let the other person know. It will most definitely cause a few giggles, but it’ll do the trick and help lighten the mood when you feel like it’s most needed.

5. Say it Wit Ya Chest

Having a tough time getting your point across? Next time you need to be bold and say something with conviction, say it wit ya chest! That’s the advise that Hart gives, at least, claiming that if you’re questioning what someone is saying to be false or just bashful, then challenge them into saying it with their chest out. No, don’t front, but don’t deliver something like a shy kid, either.

4. The Way My Bank Account is Set Up

For those who feel like you’re getting taken advantage of by friends who seem to be freeloading off of you anytime you go out to dinner or grab drinks, this might be a trick worth trying out. With Hart explaining how he has more money now that his popularity has grown, he doesn’t just say he’s not paying, but uses a clever excuse instead, blaming his not picking up the bill on the way his bank account is set up. Sure, no one will buy it, but chances are they will buy whatever’s on the bill when you use it enough.

3. Real, Rap Raw

One my favorite phrases to use in everyday life is, “real recognize real,” so when I heard about Kevin Hart’s rapper alter ego Chocolate Droppa using his own spin of it, “real, rap raw,” I couldn’t help but laugh. So what’s its meaning? From what I’ve gathered, it’s just a way to put things into perspective and let people know that whatever he’s about to say is pretty serious. I would advise using this towards coworkers in a meeting, but when in front of friends, it totally works.

2. No, Noooo

When you’re not quite ready to do something—or just don’t want to—rather than pout or throw a fit, use Hart’s no, nooo line to add a little humor to the situation. It might not let you do exactly what you want to, but, who knows, it might actually get you what you want? The key to this one is to overly express yourself with your facial movements, making it look like you’re a crying child who isn’t ready for whatever another person is asking—even if it’s as simple as responding to a friend asking if you’re ready to grab some food.

1. You Gon’ Learn Today

Want to really put someone in their place? Try busting out my favorite line that Kevin Hart has brought to the mainstream. Saying ‘You gon’ learn today’ with emphasis will prove that you’re probably a little more casual than you want to be, but that whatever you’re about to say is actually pretty serious. Look the person dead in the eye and put them in their place by using this and proving that you have a little bit of an attitude in getting your lesson across.


Read more at http://celebritytoob.com/did-you-know/8-kevin-hart-quotes-can-use-daily-basis/#BWTdK5Z58vhIhw4V.99

Did any of you see the movie Blackbird on opening weekend or since then? If you did see it, how was it?

Well the story line is seventeen-year-old Randy tries very hard to be a good person. Since his father left, Randy takes care of his emotionally disturbed mother, and he's the kind of friend all of his classmates can depend on. As strong as he seems on the outside, Randy is hiding a secret inner struggle and denial of his true self. It's not until he opens himself up to love that he discovers that becoming a man means accepting who you really are.

http://www.blackbirdthemovie.com/

Links to Being Mary Jane Seasons One and Two Soundtracks

Have you ever wondered how you could get your hands on the beautiful music playing in the background when you were watching Being Mary Jane? Well I’ve got links for seasons one and two.Season two’s link is http://www.tunefind.com/show/being-mary-jane/season-2 . Season one is http://www.tunefind.com/show/being-mary-jane/season-1 . Most of them are available for purchase on emusic.com (which is cheapest if you are a member),Amazon.com or Itunes and the price points are in that order.

Many songs are by  Erykah Badu, Nikki Minaj, Sam Smith and Mary J Blige. However, others are by less known artist like the theme song for Being Mary Jane which is   Flawed Beautiful Creatures  by Stacy Barthe the song from the bathtub scene in season 2 episode 5  Here in My Skin  by Nastasia Griffin and the wonderful song from that same episode  Ginger Me Slowly  by Somi.
Now if someone can find a link to the soundtrack to the movie premiere for Being Mary Jane, please get that to me so that I can get those songs out to everyone also.

Pray for Nepal (April 25th 2015 Earthquake)

More than 3,300 deaths have been confirmed, and the death toll is expected to rise. At least 18 were killed and dozens more were injured on Mount Everest, where the quake launched an avalanche. Dozens if not hundreds remain trapped under mounds of rubble. The nation's capital of Katmandu was particularly hard hit.Outside Nepal, a total of at least 61 died in India, Bangladesh, China's region of Tibet and Pakistan. The quake struck before noon local time about 50 miles northwest of Katmandu in an area that the U.S. Geological Survey calls one of the most seismically hazardous regions on Earth. It was felt as far away as Lahore, Pakistan; Lhasa, Tibet; and Dhaka, Bangladesh. Multiple aftershocks, including one registered at magnitude-6.7, followed. The quake registered as a magnitude-7.8. Although on a major plate boundary with a history of large- to great-sized earthquakes, large earthquakes in this area are rare in the documented historical era, the U.S. Geological Survey reports. Over the past century, just four events of magnitude-6.0 or larger have occurred within about 150 miles of Saturday's earthquake. An earthquake's power increases by 10 times with each increase in the number of its scale. That means Saturday's earthquake — the same magnitude as the one that hit San Francisco in 1906 — was 22 times more powerful than the 7.0 quake that devastated Haiti in 2010. A number of buildings collapsed in the center of the capital, the ancient Old Kathmandu, including centuries-old temples and towers. Among them was the Dharahara Tower, one of Katmandu's landmarks built by Nepal's royal rulers in the 1800s and a UNESCO-recognized historical monument. It was reduced to rubble and there were reports of people trapped underneath. The Katmandu Valley is densely populated with nearly 2.5 million people, and the quality of buildings is often poor. It will be awhile before we know the full extent of the damage and the final death toll. At least 29 districts have been designated as crisis zones. Hospitals in the capital have been overwhelmed. About 90% of the 1,000 homes in the villages of Laprak and Barpak near the epicenter were destroyed. The quake will likely put a huge strain on the resources of Nepal, a poor country best known for Everest. The nation is highly dependent on tourism. More avalanches are likely on Everest and it's unclear how those stranded on the mountain will be evacuated to safety. Numerous countries around the world have pledged immediate aid and supplies. Humanitarian groups such as the Red Cross, Oxfam, CARE and Save the Children are working to provide shelter, clean water, sanitation and emergency food supplies. You can also help by contributing to one of a number of aid groups.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2015/04/25/nepal-earthquake-things-to-know/26367507/

Spy Wednesday

Judas sold Jesus out for thirty pieces of silver on the Wednesday before Good Friday according to Matthew 26:14 Then one of the Twelve—the one called Judas Iscariot—went to the chief priests 15 and asked, “What are you willing to give me if I deliver him over to you?” So they counted out for him thirty pieces of silver. 16 From then on Judas watched for an opportunity to hand him over.  This is why today is Spy Wednesday of Holy Week. What value do you put on your relationships with people and your relationship with the Lord? For what rewards or pleasures are we willing to betray each other and the Lord? In what ways do we betray each other and betray God?

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=mathew+26&version=NIV

Holy Week

Holy Week is the last week of Lent, the week immediately preceding Easter or Resurrection Sunday. It is observed in many Christian churches as a time to commemorate and enact the suffering (Passion) and death of Jesus through various observances and services of worship. Holy Week begins on Sunday, March 29 and ends on Saturday, April 4.

http://www.claudetteacopeland.org/