Thursday, August 20, 2015

Session 1 The War Revealed by Dr Tony Evans from Victory in Spiritual Warfare: field guide for battle


In the blockbuster film Inception the main characters discovered a way to enter 
another realm—the realm of dreams. Though the dream seemed as vivid and 
authentic as the real world, the dream realm was not their reality
Because the dream felt real to their five senses, each character created an item 
used to let others know if they were in a dream or in reality. Without the item, 
the person in the dream might believe the dream was reality, and they might 
stay there—operating by the laws of reality within the realm of the dream.
The main character’s item was a spinning top. If his top kept spinning endlessly, 
that meant he was in a dream. If it fell, he had woken up. The knowledge that 
he was in a dream enabled him to take more risks and live differently because 
he knew at any time, he could simply wake up in reality.
Is it possible that right now our ultimate reality isn’t happening in the physical 
world as we see it? Could it be that right now there is a spiritual battle waging 
all around us in the unseen realms and that battle has physical effects in this 
world? If that’s true, then most of us walk around in this world with no idea of 
what’s happening in the spiritual one. The top keeps on spinning.
The spiritual world is real. Conversations, decisions, and battles that occur in 
the spiritual realm unilaterally impact what takes place in our physical lives. 
Unless we realize that truth and wake up to the battle, we will continue to 
look for physical solutions to solve spiritual problems manifesting themselves 
in our physical lives. Time to wake up and get in the real fight!!!




Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Get in the fight! by Dr Tony Evans from Victory in Spiritual Warfare: field guide for battle

Whether you recognize it or not, there is currently a war going on all around you.
It’s a cosmic conflict of such ferocity, size, and scope that it makes all other wars
pale in comparison. This is the battle being waged in the heavenlies, and it’s a battle
God is calling you to wake up to.
This wake-up call is being issued to Christian men and women, for the vast majority
of us, though we know Christ and might have a pew reserved in church every
Sunday, are nonetheless living defeated lives. We try and fail, and then try and fail
again. No matter what we do, we can’t seem to live in the way the Bible describes
the life of the Christian.
We are plagued by anxiety, hang-ups,
 compulsions, and addictions.
No more!
God has already given the Christian everything needed to live in victory. Because
of the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, victory is not only possible—it’s
already been assured. His victory is our victory. All that’s left is for us to connect the
visible, physical world with the victory already given to us in the invisible, spiritual
world. Amazingly, we aren’t fighting for victory; we are fighting from victory.
That’s what this study is about—understanding and implementing the victory
of Christ through the essential pieces of spiritual armor God has given the believer
to wear.
Over the next eight sessions, we will learn about all God has already secured for
the believer in Christ. We will discover together what each piece of armor is and
how to put it on. We will see that this armor is to be employed every day in real
life situations. And together, we will learn to live in the victory God has won for
us in Christ.

Psalm for the Second Day of the Week from the Jewish Prayer Book (p. 50-51). Vook, Inc.. Kindle Edition.





This is the Second Day of the Week on which the Levites in the Temple used to say:— (Psalms 48:1-14) A Song; a Psalm of the Sons of Korah. Great is the Lord, and highly to be praised, in the city of our God, in his holy mountain. Beautiful in elevation, the joy of the whole earth is mount Zion,— at the sides of the north,— the city of the great king. God hath made himself known in her palaces as a stronghold. For, lo, the kings met each other, they passed on together. They saw it; then were they amazed; they were confounded, they hasted away. Trembling took hold of them there; pangs as of a woman in travail. With an east wind thou didst break the ships of Tarshish. As we have heard, so have we seen in the city of the Lord of hosts, in the city of our God: God will establish it for ever. (Selah.) We thought of thy loving kindness, O God, in the midst of thy temple. As is thy name, O God, so is thy renown unto the ends of the earth; thy right hand is full of righteousness. Let mount Zion rejoice, let the daughters of Judah be glad, because of thy judgments. Compass ye Zion and go round about her: count the towers thereof. Mark ye well her rampart, traverse her palaces; that ye may tell a later generation, that this God is our God for ever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death.



Monday, July 27, 2015

The Most Powerful Prayer You’ll Ever Pray by Adam Houge from The 7 Most Powerful Prayers That Will Change Your Life Forever! (Kindle Locations 56-146)



It is written, “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.” John 3: 16-17

When understood in the proper light this scripture has a truly profound impact on our lives. One that will transform our hearts and change our lives forever. But in order to understand it, we need to understand the most powerful and life-changing prayer you could ever pray. This prayer we are about to discuss is so important that it will always be the first in several of my prayer books. I can’t express enough the need for us to pray this. Without seeking and praying for God’s saving grace, there is no grace for us at all. God desires a relationship with us at a personal level. He is a very intimate and relational Person Who loves each and every one of us. He knows everything about us, but treasures us so much that He still wants to know us more. There is a difference between knowing things about someone, and knowing him personally and intimately. I’m sure you could think of a famous actor and say, “oh I know about him!” But then someone who is a personal friend with that actor would brag, “yeah, but I know him personally!” The person who is a good friend of the actor will know the truth about him: whether the rumors the magazines publish are true, or just made up to get readers. They’ll know everything about that person’s life, and enjoy every moment with him. Why? Because they’re friends! God works the same way. There are many things said about God, but there is only one way to know the truth about Him –through an intimate relationship with Him. God desires that friendship with you, and wants to enjoy every minute of it. He loves you! No matter where you’ve been and no matter what you’ve done, God loves you. A few of you reading this may have done something so terrible that it would lead you to think that God can’t possibly love you. But God says He still does. Can you believe Him? Can you believe that God is better than you and can love you even when you wouldn’t love yourself? Can you believe He will forgive you even when you can’t forgive yourself? You already know that a relationship with Him requires faith, and this is one of those times you need faith. Have faith that God is better than you and can love you even when you can’t love yourself. Now God does love us, but He does NOT love our sin. In order for you to be saved, God had to come down as a man and suffer a horrible and gruesome death. We read in the Bible that He was “Pierced for our transgressions.” So because we sinned He needed to be crucified. If He was not mocked, beaten, tortured, whipped, stripped naked, and crucified, neither you nor I could be saved. There would be no hope for us AT ALL! Due to our sins against God, His wrath would still abide upon us. But God is a loving God and doesn’t want to have wrath. He, as a Judge, has perfect justice. So His heart dictated that He needed to have justice on our sins, and our sins require wrath. Because God loved us, He decided to give us a way out of judgment, and yet still have justice on our sin. He chose to have that wrath laid on His own shoulders for our salvation. You need to understand how much He loves you! Even though we deserve Hell for sinning against Him, He can’t stand the thought of sending us there. He’s not a vengeful wrathful God, but perfectly loving. He made you. He formed you in your mother’s womb and sewed all your sinews. He connected all your bones and brought you forth in life. He gave you your life to love you, not to condemn you. We read in the Bible that God knows all things. He knows your heart, your frame (remember He made it), everything you’ll ever need, and everything you’ll ever aspire to be. He hasn’t only known you now that you’re alive, He’s known you since before time. Before He ever created time, He thought of you. You are not an accident! You are a purposeful well-thought, out creation of God. He’s been spending thousands of years thinking of you. How you will look, and act. How you will respond to life, and how life will respond to you. He’s been thinking of these things before the world ever spun on its axis. Before He created anything He’s been cherishing you in His heart and in His thoughts. He planned you and has always had a plan for you. God has spent so much time thinking about you and cherishing you that He treats you like His own child in His heart. If your child does something wrong, don’t you want to turn them around again? If your child committed a crime deserving of death, wouldn’t you
try to save them from it? “Maybe if they’re sorry and change their life, they won’t have to die,” you might think. What would you do if you were told someone had to die, and were given the choice to die for them? What if that person sinned against you or your children? Would you die for them? Would you give your child’s life for them? But God is so loving that even though we sin against Him, He chose to give His Son’s life to save us. He doesn’t want vengeance. He wants to give you life. Your life was His plan to begin with and it’s the reason you were born! But perfect justice must be served. Any sin we commit is deserving of death. It is an act of rebellion against God who gave us life. God knows what we deserve, and must administer perfect justice for our crimes. Even the smallest sin separates us from Him. He’s an all holy and perfect God who knows no sin. He declared from creation that anyone who sins in any way, no matter how small, is worthy of death. But He has loved you so much that He couldn’t stand the thought of living in eternity without you. Nothing would break His heart more than being without you. So He, like any loving parent, chose to stand in your place. He came down and was born as a man, and named Himself Jesus, which means “deliverer” or “savior.” He called Himself this because He wanted to save you from the penalties of your sin. Perfect justice needed to be met, and someone needed to die for your sin, so He like any loving parent chose to stand in your place. Even though we were wicked against Him, He still chose to die out of love for you. He chose to die to save you, in the hope that His death would convict you of your sins. He hopes that you might repent and live for Him as you were created to do. Remember what we said, “Maybe if they’re sorry, they won’t have to die.” This was His mindset when He sacrificed Himself for you. He wants us to be sorry for our sins, and repent. Repent means to do a complete 180 in life –to turn and go the opposite direction from the way we’re going. And this is His heart toward you. God doesn’t want you to go to Hell, He loves you! He cares so much about you! He has shown you by His sacrifice that He would rather be beaten, whipped, tortured, completely humiliated, stripped naked, and murdered on a cross than spend another moment in eternity without you. You’re so precious to Him! Don’t turn Him away, and don’t turn Him down. He has loved you, even when no one else has. How could you pass up this kind of love? No matter what your decision is now, God will always love you. Even if you hate Him, He’ll still love you. He’s perfect and can’t help but be perfectly loving. But He has perfect justice too. He doesn’t want to have wrath on us, but if we can’t be sorry for the things we’ve done and change our lives, He can’t save us. It is our own decision and not His. He gave us that decision and gave us freewill. He gave us a way out, and if we don’t take it, there is no other way to be saved from condemnation. There is no other name by which we must be saved than Jesus Christ. If we don’t take His gift, then in Judgment, God with tears in His eyes, will guide you down the path you wanted. He will love you and guide you all the way to the gates of Hell. It’s never what He wanted, but if you pass Him up today, that’s what you wanted. He wants to give you a way out and chose to die for you so you could have one. Don’t pass up this opportunity. There will never be another one. I want to encourage you to take this opportunity for grace, right now, and ask Jesus Christ to be your Lord and Savior.

Please Pray With Me, “Lord, I know I’ve sinned and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for every way I’ve ever hurt You or anyone else. God, I repent! I want to change my life! I want to be better for You. Please forgive me. God I can’t do this myself. I failed at this life You gave me the first time I tried. Please help me God. Please help me to do this right. Please give me your Holy Spirit now that I may be alive in You. Give me Your Spirit, Lord, that I can have strength to please You in all things. Create in me a new heart. I devote my life to You now. Please, Jesus, be my Lord and Savior forever. Amen.”

The Lord’s Answer, “Oh Beloved! Oh My precious baby! I’m so happy with you! I’m so proud of you! I’ve never been happier with you than right now! I am telling you the truth, there are tens of thousands of angels rejoicing before Me because of you! You have set a fire in their hearts, and they can’t help but sing and dance that I have my baby back! “This is all I ever wanted –for you to be sorry, and give your life to Me. I created you to have a relationship with you. I made heaven and earth for this reason, that I may have a place to meet with you and connect with you: My new friend. How could you not think that I love you? I’ve done all these things for you, because you mean so much to me! Now let Me mean much to you, and devote yourself wholeheartedly to Me. “Let Me be the center of your life. Let Me live in you and with you. Let Me guide you and take you by the hand. Let Me choose your path in life, because I know what will lead you to perfection. Let Me take care of you. I will take care of you! You are My baby after all! “Surrender to Me, and let Me be your Lord in everything. I will take care of you and I will save you from everything that comes your way. I promise! But be good to follow Me now, and listen to My convictions. I will speak into your heart through My Holy Spirit, so incline your ear to Him. Listen to My convictions and do the right thing. Obey His conviction! I know what is best always. So always follow Me and obey Me. “Grow in Me and grow close to Me. Serve Me and where I am you will be also. You are not serving Me if you don’t listen to Me. Be diligent to obey Me, and not your own heart. If you’re making Me your Lord, then deny your life and let Me rule over you. I have a use for you. I have a plan for you. Let me take you by the hand to fulfill it. Let Me lead you in your walk with Me. Besides, I know the way to where we’re going, not you! “I’m going to give you eternal life so you can be with Me, where I am, forever. I will do this so long as you continue in Me, and obey Me as I have commanded you.”






Sunday, July 5, 2015

15 Things All Dads of Daughters Should Know by Justin Ricklefs





,"I feel SORRY for you when they become teenagers." "Dude, you're surrounded by women." "What did you do to deserve that?"

Being a dad of four daughters (we also have one son), I hear stuff like this almost daily. And honestly, I'm the one who feels sorry for people who think this way.

Having daughters is one of the greatest joys I could imagine. We have a saying at our house that goes like this, "I love you more today than I did yesterday." Raising girls is a privilege, not a burden.

I certainly don't have it all figured out, but I have learned 15 things about raising girls these last 11 years.


1. She wants to be loved. More than she wants the stuff you can buy her or the things you can teach her, she wants you to love her. No one else on Earth can assume YOUR role as daddy. Your daughter will let you down, make huge mistakes, and maybe even turn her back to you for a season, but don't ever let her doubt your love for her. Look her in the eye and tell her you love her. Lots.

2. You have an influence on her future partner. Scary thought, but the kind of man you are to her will have a direct impact on who she chooses to marry some day. For years, our third daughter would beg me to marry her when she grew up. I had to explain that I was ALREADY married to her amazing mother. If you're doing it right, she'll want to marry someone like you one day.

3. Listen to her music. When my girls are in my car, you'll be able to catch us rocking out to the following PANDORA stations: Taylor Swift, One Direction, Cody Simpson, Kidz Bop Radio, Katy Perry, you get the point. Not stations I'd listen to on my own (with one exception -- I love Taylor Swift), but when it lights them up, it lights me up.

4. She's watching how you treat her mom. If you take one thing out of this entire list, make it this. One of the best things you can do for your daughter is to love her mom well. It's easy to be child-centered. Running from one kid ACTIVITY to another. But fight for your marriage and make it a priority. The seasons of life when I lose focus on dating Brooke (my wife) are also the same seasons when our children have more issues. I don't think that's coincidental. Love your wife, make time to date her, take her on trips, and show your kids that she is a bigger priority than they are.

5. Don't shrink back as she grows up. Our oldest is almost 11, so we haven't hit the dreaded teenage years, but I say bring them on. Dads who are further down the road than I am regret not being more emotionally engaged with their teenage daughters. It will be awkward for all of us, but I'm leaning right into it. Periods, boyfriends, shaving armpits, Snapchat, whatever it is. My girls won't know any different than their dad being every bit as engaged when they're 15 as he was when they were 5. Don't DISAPPEAR when their emotions and bodies start changing.

6. Teach her how to do a real push-up. I won't be mistaken for Billy Blanks, but we take health and wellness seriously at our house. My girls aren't wimps. They know how to do real push-ups. They play sports hard. They think "throwing like a girl" is a compliment, not an insult. They bring it. And more than the physical toughness, we're raising mentally tough girls. Like their momma. In a world where femininity gets assigned far too often to princess dresses and fairy tales, my girls are tough as nails.

7. Make memories. A friend once told me that my job is to be the Chief Memory Maker of the house. It's morbid, but I have 50-60 years left on this Earth, tops. That's not a ton of time, so I'm going to go hard and create as many memories with my girls as I possibly can. We celebrate big things like a 10-year-old trip, but we also take the little things seriously. Family movie nights on Friday nights. Big breakfast Saturdays. Hikes after church. It doesn't have to be expensive or elaborate, but it does have to be intentional. Fill up YOUR daughter's emotional journal with memories of being with her dad.

8. Teach her that it's not about her. Something amazing happens when we realize that the universe doesn't SPIN around us. We're not modeling it perfectly for our girls, but we're trying to show them that life is best lived when we give ourselves away. To serve others. To go last. To not always have to be right.

9. Show up to her EVENTS. As dads of young daughters, most of us are building CAREERS at the same time. So it's not possible every single time, but make the effort to get to her stuff. Even if it's not your favorite stuff. I hate the commercial of the dad at the daughter's dance recital who is watching a football game on his phone. I love a good football game as much as the next guy, but clap as hard for your daughter's recital as you would on your couch watching sports.

10. Proximity doesn't equal presence. I'm guilty of forgetting this often. The simple fact that you're there doesn't mean you're really there. Especially in an era of constant information and entertainment. Turn your phone off when you get home from work. Or at least put it in another room. Your daughter couldn't care less about your Twitter feed, YOUR EMAILS, your fantasy football team, or your group texts. She cares about spending time with you. Playing with you. Being with you.

11. Do her hair and nails. Brooke does this 99 times out of 100, but I make it a point to tell all my girls that daddy can make a killer ponytail. And I can paint their nails like a champ. Heck, they've painted mine on many occasions as well. Show her that a man can be gentle.

12. Date her. I wish I could say I do this consistently, but even once every few months is better than not at all. Dating your daughter is critical to showing her how a man should treat a woman. Call me old school, but on my dates with my girls, I OPEN the doors, pay the bills, look them in the eye, and make them feel like a million bucks. This doesn't have to cost a ton of money. A walk around the block. A short bike ride. A trip to the ice cream store. Doesn't have to be fancy, but again, it must be intentional.

13. Her heart is more beautiful than her appearance. Guess what, dad? It's your job to tell your daughter, and then remind her a million times, that what's on the inside of her is what will make her go far in life. The heart is how we talk about it at our house, but it can be her character, her self-worth, her core. Raising girls in this sensual world isn't easy, but they don't have to settle for the belief that to be pretty means you must fit into a size zero or show almost every piece of your skin when you walk into a room.

14. Don't blink. Kenny Chesney was right. She calls you daddy. Enjoy that role -- it flies by.

15. Will you forgive me? I forget 1-14 more than I would like to admit. I'm doing my best. You are too. But when I blow it, when I hurt her feelings, and when my intentions were better than my actions, I'm learning to ask her for forgiveness. Not a simple apology, but a sincere plea for forgiveness. Model being a dad who gets down on her level and admits that you don't have it all together. She'll forgive you for that.

Dads, YOUR role is a precious one. Love your daughters well.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/justin-ricklefs/15-things-all-dads-of-daughters-should-know_b_5914680.html

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Former Evangelical: The Truth About Christian 'Sexual Purity' The author of "Virgin Nation" talks about her experience with the anti-premarital sex conservative Evangelical Movement y Sara J. Moslener / Religion Dispatches June 30, 2015 (There are so many disturbing things in this article)



What inspired you to write Virgin Nation?

I’ve been familiar with evangelical purity movements since I was an evangelical teenager. When I was young, “Why Wait?” by Josh McDowell was the only national program available—everyone was watching this VHS series in Sunday School or Youth Group.

One girl at my Christian school wore a shirt that said “I’m NOT Doing It” and listed all the bad things that could happen if you had sex. I myself wrote a letter to my local newspaper that had run a story about how teaching sexual abstinence was not realistic. I, the ever-zealous—and completely naïve—young evangelical, argued otherwise and offered myself as an example of teenagers who believed it wasn’t right to have sex.So though there weren’t yet OPPORTUNITIES to take pledges and wear rings, I made a point to publicly declare my commitment to sexual abstinence before marriage.Several years later I was in my senior year of college (also a Christian institution) and was hired to stage-manage a large concert EVENT at a local church. The event was being sponsored by True Love Waits—one of the more prominent purity campaigns developed by the Southern Baptist church.



The main speaker was a young woman named Giana Jessen who promoted the value of sexual purity by describing her mother’s experiences as a pregnant adolescent. Her mother had attempted to abort her child and had failed. A NURSE at the hospital rescued the child who, it turned out, was Jessen herself. By this time I no longer affilliated with the evangelical tradition and harbored deep suspicions about their tactics and theological assumptions. Hearing Jessen’s story and being part of the context in which it was used became a memory that practically etched itself in my skin.

Her story was something I needed to make sense of, and as the years wore on it became a heavy ghost that seemed to follow me everywhere.

It took me a while to formulate the questions I needed to ask about the history of evangelicalism, gender, and adolescent sexuality—and eventually a graduate school course would allow me the resources and OPPORTUNITYto look into them. The project took on different shapes as a course paper, doctoral dissertation, and eventually Virgin Nation. I had to be talked at the dissertation stage by my advisor, whose prodding was instrumental in giving me the courage to move forward given my own past affiliation with the movement.

I’m a big believer that most academics are really writing their own stories. The more authentic we are with those stories, the more people CONNECT TO the histories we are trying to uncover.

Researching this history was a practice in chasing and catching those ghosts that seemed to haunt my life as a young adult. The timing for Virgin Nation is serendipitous to say the least. There are now many people who have passed through the purity culture and are telling their own stories of reclaiming their bodies, their sexuality, their relationships. Virgin Nation is a project in that same vein—though that may only be evident to those who know me well.Researching and writing this book was a way to give flesh to those ghosts, to exorcise the spirit of the over-zealous, evangelical teen. I turned out to be a historian, so that’s the medium I am able to make use of.

What’s the most important take-home message for readers?

Sexual purity movements, past and present, are not ultimately about PROMOTING a biblical view of sexuality. They are about explaining large-scale culture crises (e.g. Anglo-Saxon decline, the Cold War, changing gender roles and sexual mores) and providing a formula for overcoming those crises.

Today’s movement is laden with a therapeutic rhetoric that presents these choices as the best choices for those who seek to conform their behaviors to God’s will. It promises that those who conform will enjoy spiritual, physical, and emotional satisfaction in their MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIPS. Other scholars have parsed these claims in more sophisticated ways than I do and many other writers have demonstrated that these expectations are anything but a path to personal well being. What I’m saying is that sexual purity has never been about personal well-being for evangelical adolescents— or anyone.

Each historical example I analyze demonstrates that purity work and rhetoric has emerged at moments when socially conservative evangelicals seek to assert and maintain their political power. Sexual purity isn’t about what Abby and Brendan do on a Friday night, it’s about CONSTRUCTING a view of the United States as a nation in distress and claiming that evangelical Christianity can not only best explain the crisis, but save us from our demise.

Is there anything you had to leave out?

For a long time I considered writing an addendum about post-purity evangelicals. This is a concept introduced by Abigail Rine who wrote in The Atlantic about the growing NUMBER of evangelicals and former evangelicals who’ve been recounting their experiences with sexual purity. Many of these are women who are writing through their own struggles with sexual shame as a result of learning at a very young age that sex was threatening to their physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being.

What’s emerged, especially in the work of women like Rachel Evans Held, Sarah Bessey, and Dianna E. Anderson, is a new strain of Christian feminism. And that’s significant. Really significant. It needs a book of its own. In the end, I had to be the academic and recognize this narrative didn’t help me to establish the argument I was making about national SECURITY.

What are some of the biggest misconceptions about YOUR topic?

When I’ve given talks there is always someone who is expecting me to make a prescriptive statement about the movement. That is, they want to know if I support it or revile it. I was even asked this question at my dissertation defense. On the one hand, I’m pleased, because it means readers can’t necessary tell what my own biases are. While I do have an opinion on this, my opinion is not the same thing as my book’s argument—which is supported with evidence and argumentation. My work as an historian is to describe what is, not prescribe what should be. The goal of Virgin Nation is to examine the cultural and political work done in the name of sexual purity. Whether you believe that work is the salvation of America or the root of all sexual tyranny, the book OFFERS an important historical perspective.

Did you have a specific audience in mind when writing?

I’ve always had official and unofficial audiences in my mind. Primarily, I think about other scholars working on questions of religion, sexuality, and adolescence. Being part of a conversation about these topics has always been my goal. And I hope that my colleagues are able to use Virgin Nation to conduct their own conversations with students and readers.My unofficial audience is the group of people I mention above. Those who, like me, have been working to reclaim their adolescence from the fear-based rhetoric of the movement.

(Before I ever started this project I watched Randall Balmer’s interview with Josh McDowell in Balmer’s video series, Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory. In that interview Balmer asks McDowell if it might be problematic to use fear to teach evangelical teenagers about human sexuality. McDowell responds that it’s extremely important to utilize fear because the alternative to heeding the message is so much worse. All this to say, when I use the term “fear-based rhetoric” this is not pejorative, but descriptive of the deliberate strategies used by the contemporary movement.) Though not everyone turns to history to put their mind at ease, I find that when I can articulate the origins of something that has deeply impacted my self-understanding, I am more at home in my own mind and body.

Are you hoping to inform readers? Entertain them? Piss them off?

I leave that up to the reader, because each one will have a response based on the set of questions they bring to Virgin Nation. Some will have questions from their own lives, others will have questions related to their own academic projects. As a scholar-teacher, my goal is always to EDUCATE and inform. That’s not unimportant work, especially when making sense of issues that deeply impact how we feel about our bodies and sexual choices.

What alternative title would you give the book?

I love the title and can’t imagine what else I could call it. How do you feel about the cover?

Oxford UNIVERSITY Press made this decision and I was more than delighted with it. I had initially suggested artwork by Norman Rockwell—a cover of The Saturday Evening Post that showed a young girl in white looking into a mirror with a film magazine on her lap. In the corner was a headline for another article—“The GI’s Who Fell In Love With the Reds.” The juxtapostion of that headline with the image was the perfect illustration of my argument about sexuality and national SECURITY.

OUP was also excited about this image, until they encountered too many obstacles in getting the rights. I’ve always loved Mary Cassatt’s paintings and it’s an honor to have my work associated with one of her pieces. Is there a book out there you wish you had written?

I wish I had written The Courage to Teach by Parker Palmer. More precisely, I wish I could embody the authenticity and kindness in my own teaching that Palmer describes. This book helped me a lot in graduate school when I was overwhelmed and disillusioned by academia. It helped me remember who I was in the midst of feeling like I would never be good enough for this work.

Ironically, I read it before I ever started teaching. That was a rude awakening and I quickly recognized what Palmer meant by courage. Maintaining authenticity, kindness, vulnerability—all things that make a great TEACHER, these are almost impossible to achieve in the classroom. That is, you can’t make the teaching moments Parker describes happen with only rigorous course preparation and by being the expert in the room. But this is what students expect and what we’ve come to expect of ourselves.

I live with the constant tension that what is most expected of me as a TEACHER is not necessarily what makes for good teaching. This is the paradox that Palmer helps his readers to navigate—and I wish I had that ability.

What’s YOUR next book? I’m looking more closely at the racial origins of sexual purity. Right now I’m interested in the debate between the 19th century reformer Frances Willard and the journalist and anti-lynching activist, Ida B. Wells. Wells made it known that lynching in the late 19th/early 20th century was justified by the myth of the black, male rapist. Most lynchings occurred because black men were accused of raping white women. Wells’ investigation into hundreds of lynching cases determined that most of the time when authorities discovered black men and white women having sex, it was consensual.

In SHORT, she exposed that white women not only sought to have sexual relations outside of marriage, they sometimes did so with African-American men.

Wells sought the support of the Women’s Christian Temperance Union, but its leader, Frances Willard, would not give it because Wells’ argument was based on the truth—that women were having sex across the color line. Willard believed that white women’s sexual purity was the source of their religious and moral authority. Conceding Wells’ claim would have jeopardized Willard’s own authority and the Victorian gender roles that shaped so much of late 19th century culture and PROMOTED Anglo-Saxon superiority. The public debates between Wells and Willard raise important questions about how sexual purity policed both women’s sexuality and the color line. As I discuss in the first chapter of Virgin Nation, sexual purity was the means by which Anglos achieved and maintained racial purity. My hope is to find other places in US history where race plays a significant role in the PROMOTION of sexual purity and see what else we can learn from them.


 http://www.alternet.org/former-evangelical-truth-about-christian-sexual-purity



Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Ramadan 2015 began in the evening of Wednesday, June 17 and ends in the evening of Friday, July 17

Welcome Ramadhan.jpg


Ramadan (/ˌræməˈdɑːn/; Arabic: رمضان‎ Ramaḍān, IPA: [rɑmɑˈdˤɑːn];[note 1] also transliterated Ramazan, Ramzan, Ramadhan, or Ramathan) is the ninth month of the Islamic calendar, and is observed by Muslims worldwide as a month of fasting to commemorate the first revelation of the Quran to Muhammad according to Islamic belief.This annual observance is regarded as one of the Five Pillars of Islam. The month lasts 29–30 days based on the visual sightings of the crescent moon, according to numerous biographical accounts compiled in the hadiths.

The word Ramadan comes from the Arabic root ramiḍa or ar-ramaḍ, which means scorching heat or dryness. Fasting is fardh (obligatory) for adult Muslims, except those who are suffering from an illness, travelling, are elderly, pregnant, breastfeeding, diabetic or going through menstrual bleeding. Fasting the month of Ramadan was made obligatory (wājib) during the month of Sha'aban, in the second year after the Muslims migrated from Mecca to Medina. Fatwas have been issued declaring that Muslims who live in regions with natural phenomenon such as the midnight sun or polar night should follow the timetable of Mecca.

While fasting from dawn until sunset, Muslims refrain from consuming food, drinking liquids, smoking, and engaging in sexual relations with one's spouse. Muslims are also instructed to refrain from sinful behavior that may negate the reward of fasting, such as false speech (insulting, backbiting, cursing, lying, etc.) and fighting.] Food and drink is served daily, before dawn and after sunset. Spiritual rewards (thawab) for fasting are also believed to be multiplied within the month of Ramadan.Fasting for Muslims during Ramadan typically includes the increased offering of salat (prayers) and recitation of the Quran.

Chapter 2, Revelation 185, of the Quran states:

The month of Ramadan is that in which was revealed the Quran; a guidance for mankind, and clear proofs of the guidance, and the criterion (of right and wrong). And whosoever of you is present, let him fast the month, and whosoever of you is sick or on a journey, a number of other days. Allah desires for you ease; He desires not hardship for you; and that you should complete the period, and that you should magnify Allah for having guided you, and that perhaps you may be thankful.[Quran 2:185]

It is believed that the Quran was first revealed to Muhammad during the month of Ramadan which has been referred to as the "best of times". The first revelation was sent down on Laylat al-Qadr (The night of Power) which is one of the five odd nights of the last ten days of Ramadan. According to hadith, all holy scriptures were sent down during Ramadan. The tablets of Ibrahim, the Torah, the Psalms, the Gospel and the Quran were sent down on 1st, 6th, 12th, 13th[note 2] and 24th Ramadan respectively.

According to the Quran, fasting was also obligatory for prior nations, and is a way to attain taqwa, fear of God.[Quran 2:183] God proclaimed to Muhammad that fasting for His sake was not a new innovation in monotheism, but rather an obligation practiced by those truly devoted to the oneness of God.The pagans of Mecca also fasted, but only on tenth day of Muharram to expiate sins and avoid droughts.

The ruling to observe fasting during Ramadan was sent down 18 months after Hijra, during the month of Sha'aban in the second year of Hijra in 624 CE.

Abu Zanad, an Arabic writer from Iraq who lived after the founding of Islam,in around 747 CE, wrote that at least one Mandaean community located in al-Jazira (modern northern Iraq) observed Ramadan before converting to Islam. [not in citation given]

According to Philip Jenkins, Ramadan comes "from the strict Lenten discipline of the Syrian churches".[dubious – discuss] However, this suggestion is based on the orientalist idea that the Qur'an itself has Syrian origins which was refuted by Muslim academics such as M. Al-Azami.

Important dates
The beginning and end of Ramadan are determined by the lunar Islamic calendar.

Beginning

Click to view larger image
Hilāl (the crescent) is typically a day (or more) after the astronomical new moon. Since the new moon marks the beginning of the new month, Muslims can usually safely estimate the beginning of Ramadan. However, to many Muslims, this is not in accordance with authenticated Hadiths stating that visual confirmation per region is recommended. The consistent variations of a day have existed since the time of Muhammad.

Night of Power

Main article: Laylat al-Qadr
Laylat al-Qadr, which in Arabic means "the night of power" or "the night of decree", is considered the holiest night of the year. Which occurs this year on Monday, Jul 13, 2015. This is the night in which Muslims believe the first revelation of the Quran was sent down to Muhammad stating that this night was "better than one thousand months [of proper worship], as stated in Chapter 97:3 of the Qu'ran.

Also, generally, Laylat al-Qadr is believed to have occurred on an odd-numbered night during the last ten days of Ramadan, i.e., the night of the 21st, 23rd, 25th, 27th or 29th. The Dawoodi Bohra Community believe that the 23rd night is laylat al Qadr.

End

Main articles: Eid al-Fitr and Eid prayers
The holiday of Eid al-Fitr (Arabic:عيد الفطر) marks the end of Ramadan and the beginning of the next lunar month, Shawwal. This first day of the following month is declared after another crescent new moon has been sighted or the completion of 30 days of fasting if no visual sighting is possible due to weather conditions. This first day of Shawwal is called Eid al-Fitr. Eid al-Fitr in 2015 is on Friday, the 17th of July.Eid al-Fitr may also be a reference towards the festive nature of having endured the month of fasting successfully and returning to the more natural disposition (fitra) of being able to eat, drink and resume intimacy with spouses during the day.

Religious practices

Azim Azimzade. Ramadan of the poor people. 1938
The predominant practice during Ramadan is fasting from dawn to sunset. The pre-dawn meal before the fast is called the suhur, while the meal at sunset that breaks the fast is the iftar. Considering the high diversity of the global Muslim population, it is impossible to describe typical suhur or iftar meals.

Muslims also engage in increased prayer and charity during Ramadan. Ramadan is also a month where Muslims try to practice increased self-discipline. This is motivated by the Hadith, especially in Al-Bukhariand Muslim, that "When Ramadan arrives, the gates of Paradise are opened and the gates of hell are locked up and devils are put in chains."

Fasting
Main article: Sawm of Ramadan
Ramadan is a time of spiritual reflection, improvement and increased devotion and worship. Muslims are expected to put more effort into following the teachings of Islam. The fast (sawm) begins at dawn and ends at sunset. In addition to abstaining from eating and drinking, Muslims also increase restraint, such as abstaining from sexual relations and generally sinful speech and behavior. The act of fasting is said to redirect the heart away from worldly activities, its purpose being to cleanse the soul by freeing it from harmful impurities. Ramadan also teaches Muslims how to better practice self-discipline, self-control, sacrifice, and empathy for those who are less fortunate; thus encouraging actions of generosity and compulsory charity (zakat).

It becomes compulsory for Muslims to start fasting when they reach puberty, so long as they are healthy and sane, and have no disabilities or illnesses. Many children endeavour to complete as many fasts as possible as practice for later life.

Exemptions to fasting are travel, menstruation, severe illness, pregnancy, and breast-feeding. However, many Muslims with medical conditions insist on fasting to satisfy their spiritual needs, although it is not recommended by the hadith. Professionals should closely monitor individuals who decide to persist with fasting. Those who were unable to fast still must make up the days missed later.

Suhur
Main article: Suhur

Iftar at Sultan Ahmed Mosque in Istanbul, Turkey
Each day, before dawn, Muslims observe a pre-fast meal called the suhur. After stopping a short time before dawn, Muslims begin the first prayer of the day, Fajr. At sunset, families hasten for the fast-breaking meal known as iftar.

Iftar
Main article: Iftar
In the evening, dates are usually the first food to break the fast; according to tradition, Muhammad broke fast with three dates. Following that, Muslims generally adjourn for the Maghrib prayer, the fourth of the five daily prayers, after which the main meal is served.

Social gatherings, many times in a buffet style, are frequent at iftar. Traditional dishes are often highlighted, including traditional desserts, and particularly those made only during Ramadan. Water is usually the beverage of choice, but juice and milk are also often available, as are soft drinks and caffeinated beverages.

In the Middle East, the iftar meal consists of water, juices, dates, salads and appetizers, one or more main dishes, and various kinds of desserts. Usually, the dessert is the most important part during iftar. Typical main dishes are lamb stewed with wheat berries, lamb kebabs with grilled vegetables, or roast chicken served with chickpea-studded rice pilaf. A rich dessert, such as luqaimat, baklava or kunafeh (a buttery, syrup-sweetened kadaifi noodle pastry filled with cheese), concludes the meal.

Over time, iftar has grown into banquet festivals. This is a time of fellowship with families, friends and surrounding communities, but may also occupy larger spaces at masjid or banquet halls for 100 or more diners.

Charity
Main articles: Zakāt and Sadaqah

Men praying during Ramadan at the Shrine of Hazrat Ali or "Blue Mosque" in Mazar-i-Sharif, Afghanistan
Charity is very important in Islam, and even more so during Ramadan. Zakāt, often translated as "the poor-rate", is obligatory as one of the pillars of Islam; a fixed percentage of the person's savings is required to be given to the poor. Sadaqah is voluntary charity in giving above and beyond what is required from the obligation of zakāt. In Islam, all good deeds are more handsomely rewarded during Ramadan than in any other month of the year. Consequently, many will choose this time to give a larger portion, if not all, of the zakāt that they are obligated to give. In addition, many will also use this time to give a larger portion of sadaqah in order to maximize the reward that will await them at the Last Judgment.

Nightly prayers
Main article: Tarawih
Tarawih (Arabic: تراويح‎) refers to extra prayers performed by Muslims at night in the Islamic month of Ramadan. Contrary to popular belief, they are not compulsory. However, many Muslims pray these prayers in the evening during Ramadan. Some scholars[who?] maintain that Tarawih is neither fard or a Sunnah, but is the preponed Tahajjud (night prayer) prayer shifted to post-Isha' for the ease of believers. But a majority of Sunni scholars regard the Tarawih prayers as Sunnat al-Mu'akkadah, a salaat that was performed by the Islamic prophet Muhammad very consistently.

Recitation of the Quran
In addition to fasting, Muslims are encouraged to read the entire Quran. Some Muslims perform the recitation of the entire Quran by means of special prayers, called Tarawih. These voluntary prayers are held in the mosques every night of the month, during which a whole section of the Quran (juz', which is 1/30 of the Quran) is recited. Therefore, the entire Quran would be completed at the end of the month. Although it is not required to read the whole Quran in the Tarawih prayers, it is common.

Cultural practices

Striking the bedug in Indonesia

Fanous Ramadan decorations in Cairo, Egypt

Ramadan in the Old City of Jerusalem
In some Muslim countries today, lights are strung up in public squares, and across city streets, to add to the festivities of the month. Lanterns have become symbolic decorations welcoming the month of Ramadan. In a growing number of countries, they are hung on city streets. The tradition of lanterns as a decoration becoming associated with Ramadan is believed to have originated during the Fatimid Caliphate primarily centered in Egypt, where Caliph al-Mu'izz li-Din Allah was greeted by people holding lanterns to celebrate his ruling. From that time, lanterns were used to light mosques and houses throughout the capital city of Cairo. Shopping malls, places of business, and people's homes can be seen with stars and crescents and various lighting effects, as well.

As the nation with the world's largest Muslim population, Indonesia has diverse Ramadan traditions. On the island of Java, many Javanese Indonesians bathe in holy springs to prepare for fasting, a ritual known as Padusa. The city of Semarang marks the beginning of Ramadan with the Dugderan carnival, which involves parading the Warak ngendog, a dragon-like creature allegedly inspired by the Buraq. In the Chinese-influenced capital city of Jakarta, fire crackers were traditionally used to wake people up for morning prayer, until the 19th Century. Towards the end of Ramadan, most employees receive a one-month bonus known as Tunjangan Hari Raya. Certain kinds of food are especially popular during Ramadan, such as beef in Aceh, and snails in Central Java. The iftar meal is announced every evening by striking the bedug, a giant drum, in the mosque.

Penalties for infraction
In some Muslim countries, failing to fast or the open flouting of such behavior during Ramadan is considered a crime and is prosecuted as such. For instance, in Algeria, in October 2008 the court of Biskra condemned six people to four years in prison and heavy fines.

In Kuwait, according to law number 44 of 1968, the penalty is a fine of no more than 100 Kuwaiti dinars, or jail for no more than one month, or both penalties, for those seen eating, drinking or smoking during Ramadan daytime. In the U.A.E., eating or drinking in public during the daytime of Ramadan is considered a minor offence and would be punished by up to 150 hours of community service.
In Egypt, alcohol sales are banned during Ramadan.

In Kermanshah, Iran, a non-Muslim was sentenced to having his lips burnt with a cigarette and five Muslims were publicly flogged with 70 stripes for eating during Ramadan.

Other legal issues
Some countries have laws that amend work schedules during Ramadan. Under U.A.E. labor law, the maximum working hours are to be 6 hours per day and 36 hours per week. Qatar, Oman, Bahrain and Kuwait have similar laws.

Health issues
Benefits
It has been suggested that fasting during Ramadan has numerous health benefits, including: improved brain function and alertness due to greater brain cell production; greatly reduced stress levels due to a reduction in cortisol;  a reduction of cholesterol;  a reduction of blood glucose LDL cholesterol levels; increases in HDL cholesterol; Weight loss due to the use of fat for energy while preserving muscle; decrease of waist circumference; decrease of body mass index; decrease of blood sugar; decrease of mean arterial pressure; better control of diabetes; reduced blood pressure; and a detoxification process.

Concerns
Kidney disease
Ramadan alters the circadian rhythm and the necessary water supply for humans. An updated review of the literature by an Iranian group suggested fasting during Ramadan might produce renal injury in patients with moderate (GFR <60 ml/min) or worse kidney disease, but was not injurious to renal transplant patients with good function or most stone forming patients.

Infectious disease
Mass gathering events like the gathering of huge numbers of pilgrims traveling to Saudi Arabia's holy sites during Ramadan and Hajj may give infections, such as Middle East respiratory syndrome and Meningococcal meningitis, the opportunity to spread.

Athletes
Athletes participating during Ramadan should keep in mind the necessary nutrition and sleep patterns during their training regimens. Most Muslim athletes have said that they experience their best workouts during Ramadan in the morning. Evening time workouts may cause them to feel sick. A big component of recovery after a workout is the consumption of carbohydrates. During fasting, they are not allowed to consume this, making it more difficult for the body to recover.

Crime rates
The correlation of Ramadan with crime rates is mixed: some statistics show that crime rates drop during Ramadan, while others show that it rises. Decreases in crime rates have been reported by the police in some cities in Turkey (Istanbul, and Konya,) and the Eastern province of Saudi Arabia. A 2012 study showed that crimes rates decreased in Iran during Ramadan, and that decrease was statistically significant. A 2005 study found that there was a decrease in assault, robbery and alcohol-related crimes during Ramadan in Saudi Arabia, but only the decrease in alcohol related crimes was statistically significant.Increases in crime rates during Ramadan have been reported in Turkey, Jakarta, parts of Algeria, Yemen and Egypt.

Various mechanisms have been proposed for the effect of Ramadan on crime:

An Iranian cleric argues that fasting during Ramadan makes people less likely to commit crimes due to spiritual reasons. Gamal al-Banna argues that fasting can stress people out, which can make them more likely to commit crimes. He criticized Muslims who commit crimes while fasting during Ramadan as "fake and superficial".
Police in Saudi Arabia attributed drop in crime rates to the "spiritual mood prevalent in the country".
In Jakarta, Indonesia, police say that the fact the traffic of 7 million people leaving the city to celebrate Eid al-Fitr results in increases in street crime. As a result, police deploy an additional 18,000 personnel.
During Ramadan, millions of pilgrims enter Saudi Arabia to visit Mecca. According to Yemen Times, such pilgrims are usually charitable, and consequently smugglers traffic children in from Yemen to beg on the streets of Saudi Arabia.
Ramadan in polar regions
Duration of dawn to sunset time varies in different parts of the world according to summer or winter solstices of the sun. Most Muslims fast for 12–16 hours during Ramadan. However, in polar regions the period between dawn and dusk may exceed 22 hours. For example in 2014 Muslims in Reykjavik, Iceland and Trondheim, Norway fasted almost 22 hours, while Muslims in Sydney, Australia fasted for only 10 hours. Muslims in areas where continuous night or day is observed during Ramadan follow the fasting hours in the nearest city where fasting is observed at dawn and sunset. Alternatively, Muslims may follow Mecca time.

https://en.wikipedia.org/?title=Ramadan

Saturday, June 20, 2015

Happy Juneteenth!!!

JUNETEENTH WORLD WIDE CELEBRATION

HISTORY OF JUNETEENTH © JUNETEENTH.com

Juneteenth is the oldest known celebration commemorating the ending of slavery in the United States.  Dating back to 1865, it was on June 19th that the Union soldiers, led by Major General Gordon Granger, landed at Galveston, Texas with news that the war had ended and that the enslaved were now free. Note that this was two and a half years after President Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation - which had become official January 1, 1863. The Emancipation Proclamation had little impact on the Texans due to the minimal number of Union troops to enforce the new Executive Order. However, with the surrender of General Lee in April of 1865, and the arrival of General Granger’s regiment, the forces were finally strong enough to influence and overcome the resistance.

Later attempts to explain this two and a half year delay in the receipt of this important news have yielded several versions that have been handed down through the years. Often told is the story of a messenger who was murdered on his way to Texas with the news of freedom. Another, is that the news was deliberately withheld by the enslavers to maintain the labor force on the plantations. And still another, is that federal troops actually waited for the slave owners to reap the benefits of one last cotton harvest before going to Texas to enforce the Emancipation Proclamation. All of which, or neither of these version could be true. Certainly, for some, President Lincoln's authority over the rebellious states was in question   For whatever the reasons, conditions in Texas remained status quo well beyond what was statutory.

General Order Number 3

One of General Granger’s first ORDERS of business was to read to the people of Texas, General Order Number 3 which began most significantly with:

"The people of Texas are informed that in ACCORDANCE with a Proclamation from the Executive of the United States, all slaves are free. This involves an absolute equality of rights and rights of property between former masters and slaves, and the connection heretofore existing between them becomes that between employer and free laborer."

The reactions to this profound news ranged from pure shock to immediate jubilation. While many lingered to learn of this new employer to employee relationship, many left before these offers were completely off the lips of their former 'masters' - attesting to the varying conditions on the plantations and the realization of freedom. Even with nowhere to go, many felt that leaving the plantation would be their first grasp of freedom. North was a logical destination and for many it represented true freedom, while the desire to reach family members in neighboring states drove the some into Louisiana, Arkansas and Oklahoma. Settling into these new areas as free men and women brought on new realities and the challenges of establishing a heretofore non-existent status for black people in America. Recounting the memories of that great day in June of 1865 and its festivities would serve as motivation as well as a release from the growing pressures encountered in their new territory. The celebration of June 19th was COINED "Juneteenth" and grew with more participation from descendants. The Juneteenth celebration was a time for reassuring each other, for praying and for gathering remaining family members. Juneteenth CONTINUED to be highly revered in Texas decades later, with many former slaves and descendants making an annual pilgrimage back to Galveston on this date.

Juneteenth Festivities and Food

A range of activities were provided to entertain the masses, many of which CONTINUE in tradition today. Rodeos, fishing, barbecuing and baseball are just a few of the typical Juneteenth activities you may witness today. Juneteenth almost always focused on EDUCATION and self improvement. Thus, often guest speakers are brought in and the elders are called upon to recount the events of the past. Prayer services were also a major part of these celebrations. banner

Certain foods became popular and subsequently synonymous with Juneteenth celebrations such as strawberry soda-pop. More traditional and just as popular was the barbecuing, through which Juneteenth participants could share in the spirit and aromas that their ancestors - the newly emancipated African Americans, would have experienced during their ceremonies. Hence, the barbecue pit is often established as the center of attention at Juneteenth celebrations.

Food was abundant because everyone prepared a special dish. Meats such as lamb, pork and beef which not available everyday were brought on this special occasion. A true Juneteenth celebrations left visitors well satisfied and with enough conversation to last until the next.

Dress was also an important element in early Juneteenth customs and is often still taken seriously, particularly by the direct descendants who can make the connection to this tradition's roots. During slavery there were laws on the books in many areas that prohibited or limited the dressing of the enslaved. During the initial days of the emancipation celebrations, there are ACCOUNTS of former slaves tossing their ragged garments into the creeks and rivers to adorn clothing taken from the plantations belonging to their former 'masters'.

Juneteenth and Society

In the early years, little interest existed outside the African American community in participation in the celebrations. In some cases, there was outwardly exhibited resistance by barring the use of public property for the festivities. Most of the festivities found themselves out in rural areas around rivers and creeks that could provide for additional ACTIVITIES such as fishing, horseback riding and barbecues. Often the church grounds was the site for such activities. Eventually, as African Americans became land owners, land was donated and dedicated for these festivities. One of the earliest documented land purchases in the name of Juneteenth was organized by Rev. Jack Yates. This fund-raising effort yielded $1000 and the purchase of Emancipation Park in Houston, Texas. In Mexia, the local Juneteenth organization purchased Booker T. Washington Park, which had become the Juneteenth celebration site in 1898. There are ACCOUNTS of Juneteenth activities being interrupted and halted by white landowners demanding that their laborers return to work. However, it seems most allowed their workers the day off and some even made donations of food and money. For decades these annual celebrations flourished, growing CONTINUOUSLY with each passing year. In Booker T. Washington Park, as many as 20,000 African Americans once flowed through during the course of a week, making the celebration one of the state’s largest.

Juneteenth Celebrations Decline

Economic and cultural forces provided for a decline in Juneteenth activities and participants beginning in the early 1900’s. Classroom and textbook EDUCATION in lieu of traditional home and family-taught practices stifled the interest of the youth due to less emphasis and detail on the activities of former slaves. Classroom text books proclaimed Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation of January 1, 1863 as the date signaling the ending of slavery - and little or nothing on the impact of General Granger’s arrival on June 19th.

The Depression forced many people off the farms and into the cities to FIND WORK. In these urban environments, employers were less eager to grant leaves to celebrate this date. Thus, unless June 19th fell on a weekend or holiday, there were very few participants AVAILABLE. July 4th was the already established Independence holiday and a rise in patriotism steered more toward this celebration.

Resurgence

The Civil Rights movement of the 50’s and 60’s yielded both positive and negative results for the Juneteenth celebrations. While it pulled many of the African American youth away and into the struggle for racial equality, many linked these struggles to the historical struggles of their ancestors. This was evidenced by student demonstrators involved in the Atlanta civil rights campaign in the early 1960’s, whom wore Juneteenth freedom buttons. Again in 1968, Juneteenth received another strong resurgence through Poor Peoples March to Washington D.C.. Rev. Ralph Abernathy’s call for people of all races, creeds, economic levels and professions to come to Washington to show support for the poor. Many of these attendees returned home and initiated Juneteenth celebrations in areas previously absent of such activity. In fact, two of the largest Juneteenth celebrations founded after this March are now held in Milwaukee and Minneapolis.

Texas Blazes the Trail

On January 1, 1980, Juneteenth became an official state holiday through the efforts of Al Edwards, an African American state legislator. The successful passage of this bill marked Juneteenth as the first emancipation celebration granted official state recognition.  Edwards has since ACTIVELY sought to spread the observance of Juneteenth all across America.

Juneteenth In Modern Times

Today, Juneteenth is enjoying a phenomenal growth rate within communities and organizations throughout the country. Institutions such as the Smithsonian, the Henry Ford Museum and others have begun sponsoring Juneteenth-centered ACTIVITIES. In recent years, a NUMBER of local and national Juneteenth organizations have arisen to take their place along side older organizations - all with the mission to promote and cultivate knowledge and appreciation of African American history and culture.

Juneteenth today, celebrates African American freedom and achievement, while encouraging CONTINUOUSself-development and respect for all cultures. As it takes on a more national, symbolic and even global perspective, the EVENTS of 1865 in Texas are not forgotten, for all of the roots tie back to this fertile soil from which a national day of pride is growing.

The future of Juneteenth looks bright as the number of cities and states creating Juneteenth committees continues to increase. Respect and appreciation for all of our differences grow out of exposure and working together. Getting involved and supporting Juneteenth celebrations creates new bonds of friendship and understanding among us. This INDEED, brightens our future - and that is the Spirit of Juneteenth.

History of Juneteenth ©JUNETEENTH.com

http://www.juneteenth.com/history.htm


In Richmond, Virginia, Elegba Folklore Society presents Juneteenth 2015, A Freedom Celebration June 19-21. The Society collaborates again, with Baltimore’s Ile Ise Ejiogbe Ifá Temple. Saturday, June 20, 4:00-11:00pm on the docks of The historic Manchester Dock, 1308 Brander Street, the south bank of the James River, was an entry port for Africans being brought into the Americas to be sold into slavery, and it is the site for In Reflection, On Sunday, June 21, the Esu Festival happens at Richmond’s African Burial Ground, 16tth & Broad Streets, 4:00-7:00pm. This year’s theme is in keeping with the 2015 observance of the 150th year after the end of slavery in 1865 — and Self Determination. For tickets or more information visit http://www.efsinc.org, visit Elegba Folklore Society’s Cultural Center, 101 E. Broad Street in the downtown RVA Arts District or contact the Elegba Folklore Society at 804-644-3900.

http://wtvr.com/2015/06/19/weekend-events-rva-streets-alive-juneteenth-freedom-celebration/



Father's Day is here......

Happy Father’s Day to the dads out there!!! I hope you get some good home cooked meals today, some great gifts, and most importantly some peace and quiet while you’re watching the game or whatever else you want to watch on television. IT’S YOUR DAY TODAY DAD!!! We love and appreciate you on this and every day.


8 FATHERHOOD QUOTES:

There are three stages of a man’s life: He believes in Santa Claus, he doesn’t believe in Santa Claus, he is Santa Claus. ~Author Unknown


When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Garson O’Toole


Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow. ~Reed Markham


Be a dad. Don’t be "Mom’s Assistant".... Be a man.... Fathers have skills that they never use at home. You run a landscaping BUSINESS and you can’t dress and feed a four-year-old? Take it on. Spend time with your kids.... It won’t take away your manhood, it will give it to you. ~Louis C.K.


My mother PROTECTED me from the world and my father threatened me with it. ~Quentin Crisp


You will find that if you really try to be a father, your child will meet you halfway. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com


There’s something like a line of gold thread running through a man’s words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994


http://www.quotegarden.com/fathers.html


“To become a father is not difficult, BUT TO BE A FATHER IS.”---kushandwisdom.tumblr.com

http://rebloggy.com/post/quotes-kushandwizdom-fathers-day-fathers-day-quotes/25338551196



MORE ABOUT DAD

20 Kinds of Dads - Which One are You?

There are many stereotypes and preconceived notions about what it means to be a "Dad." In general, the perception is that Dads are default parents, or the one who is 'on-call' for times when Mom has something else to do. The truth is there are many kinds of dads - good and bad - just like there are many kinds of moms or grandparents or friends.

Here's the list of 20 Kinds of Dads:
1. The Provider - this is the stereotypical role of a father. The one who works to support his family, so that mom can focus on taking care of the kids and home.
2. The Figurehead - you are the primary decision-maker of all 'big' things regarding your family. Your position is one of authority, and the kids are often kept at arms length because it's easier to control them that way.
3. The SAHD (Stay at Home Dad) - you are the primary parent in charge of taking care of the kids.
4. The New Dad - your wife is pregnant, or you have just recently become a father for the first time.
5. The Divorced Dad - you are a part-time dad because your kids live with their mother.
6. The Single Dad - you are the primary parent by necessity. Your child's mother is gone for whatever reason, or you have chosen to adopt a child on your own. Either way, you are completely responsible for your child's well-being, growth and development
7. The Deadbeat Dad - you are a biological father only. You do not care for your kids emotionally, physically or materially. You have abandoned your role as dad, and someone should beat some sense into you. Wake up! What's wrong with you? You have failed to take responsibility for your own actions (having sex and producing a baby). You are a loser.
8. The Abuser - you are a small and pathetic man who makes himself feel better by verbally, physically or sexually abusing your child. You are selfish, sick and demented. You should never have become a father in the first place. You use subversive means to control others for your own gain and benefit. You knowingly and willingly violate the basic principles of parenthood,
9. The Doofus - you are the dad who likes to play dumb. "I don't know how to change a diaper," or "I'm not equipped to deal with teenage angst or puberty." Basically, you're a decent guy and OK dad, but you're lazy. You only do the things that you think are fun with the kids. You laugh, joke and tease, and they probably think you're a pushover. Mom does all of the heavy lifting.
10. The Disciplinarian - whether you're the primary parent or not, you are the one in charge of formally disciplining the kids. You decide and administer all punishment. As a result, the kids love and fear you. At times, you may wish that these duties were shared more with mom because its tiresome being the "bad guy" (and mom being the "nice one").
11. The Referee - you are the one in the middle between your kids and each other and/or your kids and mom. It is your job to resolve conflicts within the home. Being a man, this is not always easy, as it requires lots of empathy and excellent listening skills (neither of which are common strengths for most of us).
12. The Coach - another traditional role of dads is to be a Coach of one of your kids' teams. This is often a fun way to connect and see your kids interact in a group setting. You gain great satisfaction by teaching them to share, compete and achieve goals.
13. The Fixer - you are the master repair man of the home. You enjoy helping your kids, and it gives you great satisfaction to see the look on their face when you hand them a repaired toy, doll or bike. You make chores and work around the house fun for the kids, and they enjoy spending time helping you.
14. The Outdoorsman - you are the dad who takes the kids hiking, fishing and/or hunting. You love the outdoors, so you find lots of ways to include the kids in these activities. It gives you satisfaction teaching your kids to appreciate nature, physical activity and sportsmanship.
15. The Tech Guy - you are the dad who knows everything about computers, cell phones, digital cameras, the Internet, gaming systems and all things technological. You like to play video games with the kids, and they feel comfortable text messaging you with questions. Your kids know that you monitor their use of technology diligently, and even though you appreciate the benefits of these things, you also know that kids use of them needs to be moderated
16. The Protector - your primary concern is protecting your kids and family from things that might hurt them or negatively impact their lives. You are the kind of dad who spends a lot of time making sure the house is 'baby-proofed' and all things potentially harmful are secure and out of reach. You tell your kids often about the dangers in the world, and you assure them that you won't let anything bad happen. Your family knows they can count on your for security and protection. The problem is that you can't protect them from themselves, and this causes a considerable amount of stress in your life.
17. The Scapegoat - everything that goes wrong at home, or in the kids' lives, is your fault. You are the object of blame for the kids, and they have potentially learned this behavior from mom or other family members. You are the 'whipping boy' of the family, and you struggle with feelings of parental impotence.
18. The Deaf Ear - you are the ultimate disengaged father. Your kids talk to you, but you don't hear them. You are either self-absorbed or disinterested for a variety of reasons (depression, exhaustion, marital problems, work issues). You go through all of the motions of being a father, but you're only there in body not spirit. You love your kids, but you're not really there for them or genuinely involved in their lives. As a result, your kids drift away, rebel for attention and, oftentimes, latch on to a boyfriend or girlfriend as a substitute.
19. The Stepdad - while you are technically a dad by virtue of marriage only, you have the ability to choose to be any kind of regular dad that you want. You probably struggle with feelings of acceptance by the kids, as well as your own perception of your fatherly responsibilities. The situation is influenced by the strength of relations between the kids and their biological father, if he is involved and present or not. Either way, you are still in a parental role, and your ability to influence a child's life is a responsibility that should not be taken lightly
20. The Good Dad - you are the dad that kids love and respect; adore and honor; and, obey and follow. You know that you're not Superman, but your kids think you are. You show the kids that you genuinely care about them by being involved in every aspect of their lives. You set a good example for them in the way you treat their mother, and others, with respect and dignity. You set high expectations for your kids, but you also empower them to succeed.

There are many kinds of dad, even more than the 20 listed here. As in most walks of life, there are good and bad dads, and most of them have some of both characteristics by nature. They evolve in their role over time, as they learn from mistakes and grow through experience.



To see the whole article go to:
http://discoveringdad.blogspot.com/2008/03/20-kinds-of-dads-which-one-are-you.html

WHAT DOES DAD WANT?

What Dads Really Want This Father’s Day By Susan Yoo-Lee

These frugal-friendly experts offer some insight into what to get your dad.

have to say that men in general are the hardest to shop for unless you have all the money in the world to buy them their dream car like a Lamborghini Aventador or a private island where they can fish to their hearts out or act like the cave men that they really are.

Men are simple, but they’re the most difficult to shop for when you’re on a budget. Now if you put Father’s Day into the equation, things just got even harder. You can’t just get him a bouquet of flowers like mom – or maybe you can? You might have showered him with ties, wallets, pens and money clips in the past, but I’m sure dad wants a change in gifts, and so do you.

While your dad might want something new and different, he won’t be the first to come out and say what he really wants, unless of course it’s just in his personality to do so.  So for the majority of us, it’s going to require some digging. In order to help you out, I reached out to some pretty influential fathers who told me what they really wanted this Father’s Day, so listen on.

Every dad is different, of course, and maybe yours will just be happy with a really heartfelt card, but if you’re in the mood to get creative, these suggestions might give you some new ideas. The good news is that many of these fathers below also have an appreciation of frugality and stretching a dollar.

Rick Broida, veteran tech writer for the Cheapskate on CNET and Savings.com: “My family knows I manage my own tech needs, so I don't bother asking for gadgety stuff. That said, in an ideal world I'd like the new OnePlus One, which is a fully loaded unlocked Android phone that's only $349 (with 64GB of storage)."

Alex Michael, co-founder of The Thrifty Couple website: “I'm a techie guy and love the gifts that keep on giving all year long. No, I'm not talking about that tie that will hang in my closet; I'm talking about a device that I can use every day, all day, and fill with my favorite music, videos and books. I'm talking about the gift all dads want – a new tablet! So what do I want this year? A Kindle Fire HDX 7" tablet! It’s even a great deal right now.”

Scott Ruf, Merchandising Manager at Zulily.com: “I think it’s always good to get a gift that serves a purpose; a gift that is either relevant to a hobby or is an item that I can do something with. I love getting gear or apparel from my favorite sports teams, tools I can use for entertaining  from barbecue gear to bar equipment, or a new pair of flip flops or swim trunks. Zulily will offer great deals on Rockin’ Flip Flops on June 4 and Adidas swimwear on June 6. Dads like me will love activity-oriented gifts that won’t break the bank, but still make us feel special while spending time with the family.”

Paul Ivanovsky, Founder of I Heart the Mart: “I normally get some homemade trinkets, ties or Chia pets, which are all great. You know what would be awesome, though, is golf. I would want to go play golf, not on Father's Day but another day.”

So this Father’s Day, ditch the ties, the pins and all that other stuff that you know dad really doesn’t like all that much and get him something he can use all year long. It seems that tech items are high on many fathers’ lists, which can be a great idea for those who can afford to splurge a little. Other pricier options include buying him a day pass at a golf club or maybe a ride on a fishing boat where he can catch all the fish he desires. Remember to look at daily deal sites such as Living Social, Groupon or Amazon Local for any adventures at a huge discount and if you want to buy some goods on a great sale, check out Zulily. Have a wonderful and happy Father’s Day!


http://money.usnews.com/money/the-frugal-shopper/2014/06/03/what-dads-really-want-this-fathers-day

What does Dad want to eat on Father's Day? by By Judy Walker, NOLA.com and The Times-Picayune

We all know Mother's Day is the biggest day for restaurant dining in this country. But what do you do for dad on his special day?

On Father's Day (which is this Sunday, June 21) do you take him out to a steakhouse? To his favorite brunch restaurant?

Do you cook for him at home?

Or maybe he does something on the grill for you?!?

We know Louisiana men and boys are great cooks. So what are you doing with (and for) your Louisiana dad this holiday?

Thanks for sharing. The rest of us need ideas. If you do, too, here are a few starters.

New Orleans Steakhouses: The Ultimate Guide

Choose leaner cuts and you're ready for healthier grilling.

A church in Pearl River is inviting the community to their Father's Day Breakfast.

http://www.nola.com/food/index.ssf/2015/06/what_does_dad_want_to_eat_on_f.html
MORE ABOUT FATHERS

Manifesto of the New Fatherhood

Why fathers matter now more than ever before. A charge.



1. THE CRISIS OF FATHERHOOD IS REAL
The brute facts: The NUMBER of American families without fathers has grown from 10.3 percent in 1970 to 24.6 percent in 2013;* that percentage has more or less been stable over the past few years, at about a quarter of all families, with 17.5 million children currently fatherless in the United States. At the same time, those who are fathers, those who stay with their children, have taken on the role with an unprecedented intensity. American fatherlessness is a national disaster and, according to the latest research into its effects, more of a disaster than anybody could have imagined.

2. FATHERHOOD MEANS MORE THAN ANYBODY THINKS
The new fatherhood, and the new fatherlessness, are reshaping contemporary life, from its most intimate aspects to its most public, a mostly hidden force as powerful as it is unacknowledged. In a 2014 study of more than forty million children and their parents, researchers at Harvard and UC Berkeley examined the relationship between economic mobility and racial segregation, income inequality, school quality, social capital, and family structure. Family structure showed the strongest CONNECTION. The crisis of income inequality and the decline of social capital are the subjects of wide-ranging, furious debates. The quality of schools is the main subject of almost all local politics. Family structure matters more. From the report: "Family structure correlates with upward mobility not just at the individual level but also at the community level, perhaps because the stability of the social environment affects children's outcomes more broadly."

Fatherlessness significantly affects suicide, incarceration risk, and mental health. The new fatherhood is not merely a lifestyle question. Fathers spending time with their children results in a better, healthier, more EDUCATED, more stable, less criminal world. Exposure to fathers is a public good.

3. THE ATTENTION OF FATHERS IS IRREPLACEABLE
A single small but vital fact distinguishes men of the past fifty years from all other men in history: Most of us see our children being born. It's one of those changes to everyday life that we take for granted but that have the most radical consequences. Up until the mid-1960s, the mysteries of birth were mainly the preserve of women. Then, suddenly, they weren't. Men insisted on being with their wives as they gave birth, and with their children as they came into the world. Of all the grand upheavals between men and women over the past two generations—the sexual revolution, the rise of women in the workplace, and the rest—the new fatherhood has been, in a way, the easiest. Despite no historical examples of male nurturers, no literature of the macho caretaker, men have taken to the new fatherhood in all its fleshiness and complication without much struggle, INDEED with relish. Today the overcaring father has morphed into a mockable cliché—you've seen them comparing stroller models at the playgrounds, or giving baby a bottle in a bar during the Final Four, or discussing the latest studies on the merits of early music education for "executive function." The new father is an engaged father by instinct. Witnessing birth was the beginning of a widening intimacy. The new father holds his babies. He bathes them. He reads to them. The new father knows that the role of the father is not merely to provide food and shelter. The role of the father is to be there, physically and mentally.

This intimacy is instinctive, and research into the development of children has shown how powerful a force it is. The National Scientific Council on the Developing Child puts the strength of early impressions on a biological LEVEL: "We have long known that interactions with parents, caregivers, and other adults are important in a child's life, but new evidence shows that these relationships actually shape brain circuits and lay the foundation for later developmental outcomes, from academic performance to mental health and interpersonal skills." The presence of a father affects a kid on the level of brain chemistry.

Working fathers are reckoning with the consequences of these new insights. A 2013 study from Pew Research found that men and women found nearly identical levels of meaning in childcare. The problem of work-life balance isn't just for women anymore, and the father who works eighty-hour weeks because his job is so important is no longer seen as something to aspire to. He's pitiable. The fact that women are increasingly breadwinners has opened up new options for some—the stay-at-home dad has changed from sitcom-worthy freak into the subject of endless lazy trend pieces—but even men who have power are finding new strategies. Sigmar Gabriel, the vice-chancellor largely responsible for dismantling the nuclear-power industry of Germany—a big job—has decided to take Wednesday afternoons off to spend with his young daughter. "The only luxury is time, the time you spend with your family." This is not the QUOTE of a family-values Republican senator. That's Kanye West talking.

4. FAMILY POLICY MUST BECOME ACTUAL FAMILY POLICY
The majority of two-parent American families have men and women who work, and men and women are increasingly sharing the childcare load.13 That reality—basic domestic egalitarianism—is for the most part treated as a surprising novelty, as news. And not just by op-ed writers. By TAX law. By the courts. (Men pay 97 percent of alimony3 although women EARN the majority of the income in 40 percent of families.12) The major institutions in American life are playing catch-up with a fifty-year-old development in home life—women are EARNING MORE MONEY in more families all the time, and fathers are vital to the well-being of the children involved.

Fatherhood is taking on a political imperative: Every American man deserves a chance to spend time with his children without being fired. Every American child deserves a chance to spend time with his or her father without being impoverished.

5. THE NEW FATHERHOOD BELONGS TO NEITHER PARTY
The Republicans smell an opportunity in the new research on the family but don't quite know what to do with it. This January, in a marquee speech on poverty, Florida senator Marco Rubio put the family at the center of his economic policy: "The truth is the greatest tool to lift children and families from poverty is one that decreases the probability of child poverty by 82 percent. But it isn't a government spending PROGRAM. It's called marriage." The Republicans are right this time. But they have so far used their new appreciation of fatherlessness to do little more than launch broadsides against various something-nothings of culture and to reject the idea that public policy can have any effect on the family whatsoever. For them, the new fatherhood is mostly an excuse for inaction.

If Republicans looked more closely at the consequences of fatherlessness, it might OFFER them new insight into a host of policies: Immigration reform is vital because the current policies destroy families. At the current rate of deportation, about a thousand undocumented immigrants are deported on average each day.5 By one estimate, the current U. S. immigration policy will separate more than 150,000 children from one of their parents.9 Now that we know how deeply family structure matters, that NUMBER can only be regarded as a social and economic catastrophe. The drug war, by punishing African-Americans at nearly four times the rate of whites for marijuana-possession offenses,1 amounts to cultural genocide. A few Republicans who actually DEAL with the fallout of government policies on families' lives, like governors Rick Perry and Chris Christie, have recognized the cost of these disastrous policies. Both have spoken about ending the drug war. It's a start.


Democrats, too, are making a tentative start. In February, the president announced a private-public partnership, the My Brother's Keeper initiative, a first step toward addressing the problem of minority boys through mentoring PROGRAMS. At the announcement, President Obama said: "Nothing keeps a young man out of trouble like a father who takes an active role in his son's life." It's typical "American families" boilerplate, of course. But the data show that it's actually true as a matter of policy, and not just for minority boys but for all boys. The Brother's Keeper initiative is a gesture, an important one—possibly a trial balloon?—but a small one.

For the president, a family-based approach to inequality clearly smells rotten. It has the aura of a host of outmoded prejudices many on the Left have spent their entire CAREERS fighting against. Democrats prefer to focus on the traditional approaches of grievance politics, with the emphasis on class structures and race. But the most powerful way to alter those inequities is through family structure.

6. FATHERS ARE PARTICULARLY IMPORTANT FOR BOYS
It has now been more than a decade since Christina Hoff Sommers wrote her landmark book, The War Against Boys. Boys have not lacked for articulate defenders since—dozens of titles have followed—but the fate of boys has not improved. Every stage of their lives is fraught. The DIAGNOSIS rate for ADHD is as high as 15.1 percent for American boys, a percentage more than two times the rate for girls.10 Boys are expelled from preschool nearly five times as often as girls.15 In elementary and secondary school, boys get D's and F's at more than three times the rate of girls. On twelfth-grade standardized tests, 28 percent of boys score below basic LEVELS in writing (it's 14 percent for girls), and 31 percent of boys are below basic levels in reading (it's 20 percent for girls).11 The gap in the high-school-dropout rate persists even as the general rate of dropouts declines.3 Across grades four, eight, and twelve, boys write at lower levels than girls.11 Boys' juvenile-arrest rate is more than two times what it is for girls. Boys are 71 percent of juvenile offenders.6 Boys are twice as likely to be threatened with a weapon in high school.2

Maturity and despair go together for boys. Between ages ten and fourteen, boys are about twice as likely to kill themselves. Between fifteen and nineteen, they are almost four times as likely. From twenty to twenty-four, almost five times.2 Women account for 56.5 percent of all undergrad enrollments. And women account for nearly 60 percent of bachelor's and MASTER'S DEGREES.11 So what happens in the future? What happens when the category of "man" is synonymous with the category of "uneducated," which is synonymous with the category of "failure"?

Fear is the first response to the crisis, rife even among boys' defenders, and after the fear comes the blame, two brands of it, right wing and left wing. The War Against Boys was explicitly a critique of feminism. "Boys" were the new "girls," limited and despised by a generalized misandry, a politically CORRECT fury that in its zeal to tear down the patriarchy simply forgot that men are people. On the other side, Michael Kimmel, in books like 2008's Guyland and last year's Angry White Men, has argued that the residue of patriarchy drives young men to despair and self-destruction. The old codes, the macho, the defensive response to a changing world, "the ideology of traditional masculinity that keeps boys from wanting to succeed," in his phrase, are the primary culprits.

The boy is now an alien among us, brittle but also violent. But you don't have to look far back to find other responses. Not so long ago, boys and boyishness were the ideals of society. On the walls of the American Museum of Natural History in Manhattan are written the hopes Teddy Roosevelt had for the boys of his era: "I want to see you game, boys, I want to see you brave and manly, and I also want to see you gentle and tender." Boys were strong but also sentimental—the way the war office convinced them to go to war in the early twentieth century was through their ATTACHMENT to their sisters and mothers. The boy, for most of the history of the twentieth century, represented the best of humanity.

Sommers and Kimmel are both right: The men lost without a patriarchy and the men lost in guyland are the same men. The bridge to manhood has two spans: Give boys and men a way to be proud to be boys and men, in ORDER that they can then understand that being a man is an ongoing, difficult, complicated undertaking. It's not just that the boys' crisis requires a complex response. Complexity is the response. And the best way to give that complexity, to demonstrate that masculinity requires strength and vulnerability, is by the presence of a father or a father figure. Children raised by SINGLE parents are at a greater risk for drug and alcohol abuse.4 Boys are more than twice as likely to be arrested,6 more likely to drop out of high SCHOOL,3 at least twice as likely to commit suicide.2

7. THE CRUCIAL INSTITUTIONS ARE IN RUINS
The father figures have, one by one, been torn down. They have torn themselves down. Male authority figures, for generations, were given a FREE pass, an unexamined prerogative. They abused it. Some of them still abuse it. The past fifty years have been consumed with the destruction of various patriarchies. But the crisis of today is not the handful of monsters who infect the institutions. The crisis is the 17.5 million fatherless children3 with an absence in their souls. There is no cure for fatherlessness. There are only salves. The fatherless world needs substitute fathers, men who are willing to care about the lives of children who aren't their own. The problem isn't bullying coaches. The problem is all the men who aren't coaching. The problem isn't the various inevitable failures of the men who show up. The problem is the men who don't show up.

The evils of a few have overshadowed the good of many. The coaches and priests and TEACHERS are not the enemies of civil society but its creators.

8. THE NEW FATHERHOOD ISN'T THE OLD PATRIARCHY
The old fatherhood was a series of unexpressed assumptions. The new fatherhood requires intelligence. It requires judgment. The new fatherhood is messy. It will have to be. In the face of this messiness, there are men, and not just a few, either, who retreat into fantasies of lost idylls, worlds where men were men, whatever that might have meant. Kimmel's work is full of them, guys who wallow in an "aggrieved entitlement." The new father is not so shallow nor so old-fashioned. Only the truly lost man would want to return to his grandfather's way of life. Who would want to go back to the BAD FOOD, the boring sex, the isolation? Who would want to be financially responsible for a family and then never see them? The new fatherhood is a huge gain for men, the chance for a deeper intimacy, a whole new range of pleasures and agonies, a fuller version of our humanity.

9. THE AMERICAN FATHER IS A PRECIOUS RESOURCE
At the heart of the new fatherhood is a somewhat surprising insight: Men, as fathers, are more crucial than anybody realized. The changing American father is transforming the country at all LEVELS, from the most fundamental to the most ethereal, economically, socially, politically. The epidemic of fatherlessness and the new significance men place on fatherhood point to the same clandestine truth: The world, it turns out, does need fathers.

http://www.esquire.com/lifestyle/news/a28987/manifesto-of-the-new-fatherhood-0614/


DADS THROUGH THE AGES: A HISTORY

Fatherhood changes with the times, and wasn’t always as we’ve believed it to be. Adrienne Burgess shows how fatherhood was shaped through culture and economics (mainly in Northern Europe) and how it CONTINUES to shape YOU as a father. And we ask: “how new is ‘new’ dad?

Hunter Gatherer Dad

We tend to believe that, in primitive communities, men and fathers hunted away long distance for most of the time, while mothers and grandmothers foraged LOCALLY and looked after the children
This was only true in a minority of tribes; but in many, fathers were very present most or even all of the time. In some, both sexes hunted and foraged together locally and in these there often developed a culture of pride among men that they were close to their children.
In primitive communities, it is dangerous for babies to crawl or toddle around OPEN fires, stone or earth floors, deadly insects and reptiles) so they must be carried a lot. We know that fathers did and do this in some communities, and it is likely that they did/do it many.
In some communities – mainly warlike ones - there is strong cultural pressure for men NOT to be involved with babies and young children; in others that is not at all the case. Nor, just because there is cultural pressure, do all fathers do what they’re told.

Pre-Industrial Dad

As Christianity and, later, ‘rationalism’, took hold across Europe, fathers were instructed to be the detached leaders within families. However, again many fathers didn’t do as they were told, and what went on in families was often very different!
In Northern Europe (it was different in the Mediterranean and in other parts of the world) fathers have long been key partners in the parenting team. This was because
large extended families, all living in the one place, were not the norm until the late 19th Century
grandparents often died before grandchildren were born.
there was much migration round the country, so local neighbourhood networks were often disrupted
women usually had ‘trades’ (weaving, brewing) and there is evidence that even quite EDUCATED fathers cared for children and did housework to leave the women free to work
As an example of routine ‘fathercare’, look at this lullaby (written down in 1805)
Hush thee, my baby
Lie still with thy daddy, Thy mammy has gone to the mill To grind thee some wheat To make thee some meat (this meant bread) Oh my dear babby lie still
Rural life was regulated by daylight. In winter fathers could only be away from the lighted house or cottage for a few hours. In summer the whole family often worked together in the fields. Winter and summer, very many fathers were highly AVAILABLE to their children.
Even in wealthy families, children often slept with their parents: the ‘nursery in the attic’ didn’t appear in architecture until the later 19th century
Custody of children after formal/informal DIVORCE often went to fathers; and since 8% of mothers died in childbirth, many more men than women were lone parents I is estimated that between 1599-1811, 24.1% of children lived in lone father households, compared with 1.3% today!

Industrial Dad

As the industrial revolution developed in England, in some districts mothers and children worked in factories – and dads were stay-at-home carers.
Later, the most important thing that happened to fathers was that they started working away, sometimes far away, from their homes.
Into the 20th Century this trend CONTINUED with ‘commuting’ becoming part of most fathers’ lives
Women began to take over ‘traditional’ fathers’ tasks – such as EDUCATING children. Not only were fathers spending less time with their children, but they gradually becoming ‘de-skilled’
Imperialism and ongoing wars, including two world wars, meant that all men had to be an army-and-workforce in waiting’, ready to leave their families at a moment’s notice. Many children lost their fathers, or dads who returned kept silent about their experiences. Communication with children could suffer

21st Century Dad

With women achieving so much at work, in the armed forces, in politics, gender roles are up for grabs and men are BEGINNING to feel proud of their involvement at home and keen to do more of it.
Men’s leisure time is also increasingly located at home, rather than outside of it – so home is no longer so much the women’s domain
Increasing home working and flexible working mean some fathers are getting to spend more time with their children - even though working hours are long
In some districts, as in the early Industrial Revolution, there are more jobs ‘for women’ than men; and in some families women are earning more than men, so the NUMBER of home-dads is increasing again
Adult children are living further away from their parents, so dads are key to the child-rearing team
‘New dad’ in – in terms of more men spending more time caring for babies and young children – is more visible and more common: but in all eras there have a been these highly involved fathers that we call ‘new dads’!

- See more at: http://www.dad.info/fatherhood/being-dad/dads-through-the-ages-a-history#sthash.SoYqmJhJ.XwVzqHKN.dpuf